Important note about safety and privacy

This guide is about masturbation for personal sexual wellness. It emphasizes privacy, consent to self, hygiene, and discretion. If any part feels uncomfortable, skip it or adapt the steps to what feels safe and appropriate for you.

General guidelines

  • Wash hands before and after any sexual activity to prevent infections.
  • Use a water-based lubricant to reduce friction and avoid irritation.
  • Choose a private, comfortable space where you won’t be interrupted.
  • Keep any sex toys clean and stored discreetly when not in use.
  • Set a routine that fits your morning and evening schedule without causing stress.

Morning routine (before school)

  1. Prepare: Gather a clean towel, a bottle of water-based lubricant, and a clean sex toy (if using one).
  2. Hygiene: Wash hands and genitals with warm water and mild soap. Dry with a clean towel.
  3. Stimulation steps (example, adjust for comfort):
    • Relax and take slow breaths. Your goal is gentle arousal, not rushing to ejaculation.
    • Gently touch the shaft with a light grip, moving up and down at a comfortable pace.
    • If using a toy, apply a small amount of water-based lubricant to the toy and your genitals, then gently insert or press as designed by the toy's instructions.
    • When you feel the first signs of arousal, continue with slow stimulation until you reach a comfortable level of erection. Do not force ejaculation; let it come naturally if it does.
  4. Orgasm care (optional): If you reach orgasm and ejaculation, allow yourself to calm down. This is normal and will subside with rest.
  5. Post-activity hygiene: Wipe away any fluids with a tissue or damp wipe, then wash hands and genitals with water and mild soap. Dry thoroughly.
  6. Discretion: If you live with others, consider placing a towel on the bed and having a private routine to reduce splashes and noise. Store toys in a discreet container when not in use.

Using an artificial vagina sex toy (vaginal insert or sleeve)

  • Preparation: Clean the toy before first use and after each use with warm water and mild, anti-bacterial soap or toy cleaner. Rinse well and pat dry.
  • Lubrication: Apply a generous amount of water-based lubricant to the toy’s opening and your genital area. Avoid silicone-based lubricants unless the toy manufacturer approves them.
  • Insertion and use: Follow the toy’s instructions for insertion, speed, and pressure. Start slowly, then adjust to a comfortable rhythm. Do not force anything beyond what feels safe.
  • Cleaning after use: Rinse with warm water, wash with mild soap or dedicated toy cleaner, rinse again, and dry completely before storing in a dry, discreet place.

Evening routine (after school)

  1. Shower or wash: Take a warm shower or wash to clean your body and genital area. This helps reduce odors and keeps you clean.
  2. Hygiene check: Ensure you’ve washed your hands and genitals, dried thoroughly, and changed into clean clothes and underwear.
  3. Relaxation: If you used a toy or engaged in stimulation, allow yourself time to relax before bed, then put away any toys and towel the area if needed.
  4. Discretion and storage: Place used towels in a laundry basket, wash with laundry, and store toys in a discreet container or bag in a private location.

Cleaning the penis after ejaculation

  • Rinse the area with warm water to remove fluids.
  • Wash with mild soap, especially around the glans and under the foreskin if you have one. Rinse well.
  • Dry with a clean towel. Wear fresh underwear after cleaning.
  • Wash hands after cleaning to maintain hygiene.

Hygiene and safety reminders

  • Use only water-based lubricants with sex toys to avoid material damage and infections.
  • Do not share sex toys with others to prevent infections unless they are properly cleaned between users.
  • Inspect toys for wear and tear; replace if there are cracks or rough edges.
  • If you notice any pain, irritation, or unusual discharge, stop and consult a healthcare professional.

Autism-friendly tips

  • Keep routines consistent but flexible. If you miss a step, simply continue the next time without stressing.
  • Use clear, simple language and visual reminders (if preferred) to outline the steps of your routine.
  • Prepare environments calmly: soft lighting, quiet space, and minimal distractions can help.

If you ever feel overwhelmed or unsure about any part of this routine, consider talking to a trusted healthcare provider or a therapist who can tailor guidance to your needs while respecting privacy and autonomy.